Hey there, people of deviantArt! My name is Nick Brewer, and I'm a graphic design artist, known mostly these days for my fan art of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, with most of those being vector works.
demonbarber92 was a name that I chose for myself while going through a phase of life where I wasn't necessarily thinking for the future, I guess. Nowadays I'm known on most websites and such as NicolaiB 92, give or take an underscore, since that name is a much more suitable one for being permanently related to me.
I have changed my name to Nicolai-B since writing this description, but am too lazy at the moment to re-write it all.
If you want to contact me for any reason, simply send me a Note here. It's the most likely way I'll see your message, and the obvious choice since you're obviously on deviantArt if you're reading this. If you want to chat a bit more than simple on-and-off conversation, ask me for my Skype name and we can chat on there while I'm online.
So, it wouldn't take much in the way of sleuthing to find out that I haven't really done anything artistic since my last journal entry. There's a reason for that, really. A lot of things have happened in my life since that journal entry, both good and bad, and have kept me from working on stuff.
The most direct reason that I haven't been able to make anything as I had planned to beforehand is actually computer issues. My computer hasn't been in the best of health here lately as far as its hardware is concerned, and it's put a bit of a damper on things. I was just playing some Dark Souls on my computer one day a couple of weeks ago when BLOOP! the computer just turned off in an instant. A bit of investigating revealed that the power supply, while functional, had a bit of an issue. The fan inside of it had stopped working and it had overheated. So, even as I write this I have my computer set up with a bit of a jury-rigged coolant setup, where the case is open and I have a portable fan blowing onto the power supply at all times to prevent it from overheating. Surprisingly, it works with no issues whatsoever, though I need to get a new power supply anyway. Pretty sure I saw my dog Case trying to lick my CPU the other day...
"But it sounds like you fixed that problem pretty easily, how was that an issue?" Excellent question, imaginary person in my head! You see, the power supply is a vital piece of a PC, as it provides energy to all parts of the computer on the whole. So, when it overheats, there is a chance that it can short-circuit anything plugged into it. And so it did. It fried my entire hard-drive, rendering it unusable, and erasing absolutely all of my data stored on it. I only recently got a new hard drive and got everything set up on it, though I still lack Photoshop on here, and it's a bit draining on your creative process to know that everything you were working on just went up in smoke. However, I will eventually get back into the groove of things as soon as I get over some other issues.
Other issues such as myself, that is. Here for the past month, really, I've been suffering from unusual and highly frequent bouts of depression and self-loathing. I'll be feeling just fine one moment, but at any time I can just become moody, lethargic and full of nothing but thoughts of how little I'm worth. You know, depression. The bouts last pretty much until I go to sleep for the day, so I've lost days at a time to simply not feeling like doing anything, and on top of that, it's putting unnecessary strain on my girlfriend and, therefore, our relationship in general. It's frustrating to say the least, not to mention that I cannot begin to describe to you how awful it is to just hate yourself so much for seemingly no reason. I'm hoping that quitting my job at Wal-Mart, which I loathe with a distinct passion due to a few, for lack of a better word, shitheads that I work with. I've disliked the job for over a year now, but here recently the self-loathing is constantly triggered by co-workers complaining or saying things that make me feel like I'm not doing good enough, even the nice ones who aren't actually saying that about me. Not to mention the amount of talking behind my back that I'm privy to hearing simply because some people don't know what whispering means.
I can't say for sure if quitting that job will help anything, but my last night there will be this Tuesday, so only a week left and then we'll find out. I'll be temporarily helping my dad with his own business that he runs online for what is basically just enough money to pay bills and get food until I can get another job here in town, but hopefully just getting away from those people will help out a great deal. I'll update the journal with the situation later when I know how things are going, but for now I suppose I'll just cut this journal off.
But not without an art feature! I haven't done one of these in a while, so here, enjoy it! This particular feature is from the amazing *sophiecabra, whom I had the great pleasure of meeting at Furry Fiesta 2013 back in February. She is a superb artist who sells a lot of great pony portraits both online and at various conventions all over. I hope you enjoy her work and let her know how much you like it if you do.